Woke Week

There Will Be Field Trips

The 45th and 47th "president" of the US is barely recognizable as the vulgar and destructive and delusional, mental midget we were subjected to for 15 years. It is finally, now a prisoner, scheduled a week later for execution along with the remaining cabinet members.

Now even more scraggly-bald, emaciated, sickly and dressed in rags, it appears to be perpetually terrified as though it may not last to meet its planned date with death. It stands with an unsteady forward lurch near the center of its concrete cell, aided by what looks to be a walker scored from a dumpster dive. The tennis balls at the end of the front legs look like they've been pushed through pools of excrement.

A small group of elementary school students come to a halt before trmp’s cell.
It’s “Woke Week” for Good and Pretti Elementary School.

"Well, here it is, guys,” announces the Guard leading their tour. “The old man who almost turned our country into something from Europe about a hundred years ago. Who knows what that is?"

A few hands go up. "Nazi Germany?" asked a clean-cut-looking 5th grade boy.

"That's right," answered the Guard who has agreed to take them around the recently constructed trmp Admin Block of the Washington DC jail.

"Aaaaand,” announced the Guard in his best teacher voice, “trmp and its MAGA supporters and enablers are a kind of human that's called a. . . "
The guard scanned the group of eagerly raised hands. Before he can choose, he hears a shout from the back.
"A subspecies!"

"Also correct," said the Guard. “Kinda like the Neanderthals or Denisovans, right? Only MAGA aren’t as bright. Boy, they sent me a smart crowd today!"
The kids beamed their approval.

"So. Anyone want to feed it?" Another guard is handed a small pail.
There are no volunteers.

"It stinks so bad!" said a young girl through her hands, which now covered her lower face.

“I think you mean ‘badly,’” corrected the Guard.
”But it doesn’t smell much worse than when it arrived here!"
This gets a few giggles from the kids with strains of "ew," or "gross."

Some type of slop is poured through the iron bars and the contents of the pail hit the floor with a splatter. trmp slowly dropped to a knee to scoop it up best it could.

“There’s a Good Boy," sarcastically cooed a gender neutral, brown-skinned guard wearing a "Woke Patrol" cap. "Now whaddya say, Piggy?," they barked as it slurped the mystery mush from its hands.
"Thank you, Provider and Keeper, my undocumented trans person Lord," it responded in a rehearsed and strained monotone. More laughter from the school children.

"And?" they commanded.
"Uh. . . I don't deserve this wonderful lunch?” it answered with ascending inflection.

A few more giggles and guffaws. trmp seemed unsure of the correct answer yet did not miss a beat. It knew that it had to get it right or miss the next pailful.
Or get something worse.
Woke Patrol Cap paused a second or two before repeating, “Good boy.”
"As you can see, everyone, it finally has some manners!”

Then: “Piggy need a bath today?" they asked.

It quickly looked up in a panic.
"P-please. Not the water. . . it's so cold. Please, ma'am - er. . . not Ma’am. I mean they. THEY!" begged trmp, with a bit of gruel dripping from its chin. The plea is ignored.

Woke Patrol Cap is handed a gold-plated nozzle attached to a thick, black hose. They look toward the source, nod, and level the nozzle toward a yet more terrified looking trmp. Before it can say anything more, an even and forceful blast hits its face, knocking it backwards into a small, gilded shelving unit - its swollen and shoeless feet seem to lose all purpose as its rotting frame hits the floor. The children cheer.

“OK, feeding and bathtime are over. You guys ready for the ICE Block?”
”Yeah!,” cheered the kids, as they bolted down the dim hallway.
”Don’t run, guys!”

The Guard and Woke Patrol Cap glance at each other and smile as they follow the students to the elevator.